I'm doing mankind a favor.
It's for sure now. I have found my purpose in life. I'm going to test every drug there is to be found in this universe. I'm not bullshiting. I'm not like the rest of you.
This is what I'll do.
I'll start with A and end with Z. Yeah, drugs are written with capitals because of their huge importance in many of your lives. When I test a drug I'll review it here in this article. No need for checking my page every day, you'll get notified of an update by subscribing by clicking here. Not only is this a personal quest, it's also a supersized favor I'm doing for you. Screw it, I'm not even going to do it alphabetically, I'm going to test the ones that appeal to me the most first.
I already tested one out, and it's called Alprazolam.
Reviews:
-
Alprazolam:
This one got my attention from the moment I heard of it. It's used for the management of anxiety disorders or the short-term symptomatic relief of symptoms of excessive anxiety. Anxiety or tension associated with the stress of everyday life usually does not require treatment with this. So I thought I might be cool to test it out. And it was, yet I'm never going to take it ever again. This drug can be found in 0.25 mg, 0.5 mg, 1 mg and 2 mg. I went for the 1 mg pill. I've gotten it in a 100 pill bottle, for only ... ow wait, I got it for free. At first the drug didn't do anything to me. A half hour later it was at its full capacity and made me agitated, but then it confused me about pretty much everything what was going on that moment. Not much later my stomach started hurting and I blacked out. The next day I woke up in a pool of (probably) my own vomit with a serious headache.
Conclussion: Who wants 99 Alprazolam pills for free?
- DXM:
I saw my own body lying on the bed. Not really, but it got me floating alright. Ok, first I'll give you the specifications of that "drug". DXM (Dextromethorphan) is a cough sirup you can get without any prescriptions. When they tell you about the maximum quantity you can take, ignore that instruction. Just swallow the bottle's entire content and hold on. This one put me through some stages, which I'll explain in chronical order. At first it made me laugh. I was having so much fun with my cat, and hugged an unexisting teddy bear. Then I moved on to an out-of-my-body experience. It was like I was floating away but not really out of my body. That one was quite odd and I don't know how to describe any further. But then it came. My body started itching and I got a rash, or at least I think I did. My body temperature went sky high, somewhat like a fever. I felt the urge of vomiting again but I managed to hold my stomach contents where it belongs. I'll leave out the entire thing where I was discoordinated and that shit. I was talking to some friends over a messenger that moment but still I felt disconnected from them. Maybe this comes from the whole "I'm chatting worldwide" thing. You're not connected to someone over the internet, except via a bigass motherfucking cable. There are no real bad experiences I had from it this time and am willing to use it again. Please send me bottles of this stuff to my place, and I'll resend them to you once they're empty. Recycle them for all I care. Ow wait, there's one thing I don't like of DXM and that is that it sounds like DMX.
Conclussion: Connect with this shit right now!
Other info: You can still subscribe to this article's mailinglist by clicking this link. I'll send the first mail, the one about this update, right now.
Ow yeah, my rash is gone too.
- Zolpidem:
This update is a bit different, because I didn't try this drug recently. It's a drug I had to take a year ago. It treats insomnia. I had the biggest trouble getting asleep. But after taking the medication (10 mg tablets) I felt some side effects. The effects weren't that nice, but I got addicted to it anyway. The strangest things happened to me and today I'm still hearing what I did back then. I assure you, you won't like this update. You should know one of the side effects I've had from taking this shit : amnesia. It wasn't pretty, believe me. If you do believe me, I advice you to quit reading now.
Within the first week I took those pills, I nearly shocked a friend of mine by shaving myself in front of the webcam. You can ask "But Gothrix, that isn't a bad thing, is it?" I'll answer with something between "Shut the fuck up!" and "Your face or your scrotum? It's your choise. My fist is going eitherway." It WAS that bad! I didn't shave my face. I've shaven my pubic hair. Yes, that was the first time I ever did that, but since then I do it every week. The point is that I did it in front of my webcam when it was actually broadcasting. Before you ask ... yes it was someone of the female sex. But can you imagine this : you wake up, you go to the bathroom and you take your morning leak while thinking 'freedom'. But then you notice something is different. Something's missing. You notice your pubic hair is gone and you go like "WTF?!" I assure you, once again, you don't want to be in that position. Luckely I found out what happened by the evening already. After looking at some logs on my computer and talking discretely to some people, I found out the facts behind this whole matter.
Before you find yourself in a fase like this, a lot of other things must have happened in advance. I somehow remember dizzyness, and a chill state of mind. Although it was my first medical addiction I was be able to quit it when my 30 pills were consumed. Luckely I never went after a new prescription.
Conclussion: It wasn't that bad after all. I turned out alright don't you think. You see, that was sarcasm. If you don't get it, feel free to try Zolpidem yourself.
Other info: You can still subscribe to this article's mailinglist by clicking this link. I'll send the second mail tonight when this update goes online.
Ow! ... Nah, I forgot.
- Ether, grass, beer (5.2%) :
You might think this is an obvious one. But it isn't. Here's the story:
First, I was having dinner with a beer or two. But it occured to me I bought the Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas DVD, somewhere that same day. So I've put it in whilest smoking some grass. I've seen the movie some times before and realised it sucks when you're sober. So I thought I should drink some more beers. So I did. They never talked about ether in that movie the previous times I watched it, but now they did. Maybe because of all the drugs running through my veins and messing with my brain they did this time. Or maybe I just forgot about the ether the previous times I saw it. Anyway, I tested it out. And goddamn what they said is true alright. It's not that funny as they make it seem in the movie, but it messes with your body alright. The hand-eye coordination was fucked up. Too bad I didn't walk as funny as they did in the movie. I should start videotaping myself whilest testing those drugs. This might be an idea for the next update. You know what? I'll do that! But there's a catch. Two actually. 1) Someone has to give me enough webspace to upload the video I made. 2) You have to be on my mailinglist to receive the url.
I'll just jump to the conclussion.
Conclussion: Alcohol = good, weed = good, ether = good. Those three drugs are great when used in ideal proportions.
My secret :
-- 2 joints (75% weed; 25% other stuff you can come up with)
-- 8 beers (5.2% pure alcohol)
-- as much pure ether as you can handle (none of that water based shit)
Other info: You might think this update sucks. Well ... it does. Do not attempt to drink the ether. Actually, go right ahead.
(started 04-08-06)
(last updated 05-03-06)
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